Tuesday, February 7, 2006

Discerning two plans

Abortion testimonies, especially those of women who are abortion-bound but still pregnant, are riddled with the idea that adoption is the most painful and least rewarding decision that can be made. Why? Adoption is presented in such bad light thanks to America's domestic terrorists- the abortion providers such as Planned Parenthood. These organizations are so firmly convinced that the "liberation" of an abortion is a far better decision than adoption that they have created this mentality and instilled it in the youth of America.

A testimonyon the Priests for Life site from a woman who had experienced both abortion and parenting before her current pregnancy. Knowing that she could neither handle the despair of another abortion nor the challenges of parenthood, she turned to a counselor who helped her to devise two plans: one for parenting and one for adoption. The counselor also helped to guide her in her decision making, respecting her decisions.

Let's take a look at an excerpt of her testimony:

The first person I called was my ex and his first suggestion ...abortion. It looked like I was in for another lonely, depressing pregnancy. Here I was again, scared, ashamed, disappointed confused. What in the world was I going to do? That was my question to God as I sat in the back of the sanctuary sobbing, feeling completed humiliated. The Lord was merciful. That very day, He answered that question with just one word, ADOPTION. "When, who, how, where?" I thought.

When I finally confided in a lady I met at the women's retreat, she directed me to a counselor at church. She lovingly, but firmly discipled me and helped me to develop two plans. One for adoption, another for parenting. The next nine months were spent praying, crying, researching, studying, crying, talking, growing, and crying some more. God became very real to me. His hand was as clearly involved in the whole adoption process than mine was. He led us every step of the way, from deciding on what avenue to use, to what family, to the name.

This is an encouraging testimony! From a seemingly impossible situation with the cloud of discouragement from the father of the child looming overhead, she was able to find hope and peace in an adoption plan simply because she was able to consider both options side by side.

Recommended reading: Real Choices: Listening to Women; Finding Alternatives to Abortion by Frederica Matthewes-Green. Available on her website.

1 comment:

  1. Oh my, where do I begin?

    Ok, first of all there's no evidence that eliminating adoption would increase the number of abortions. Australia discourages voluntary relinquishment adoptions AND they have a lower abortion rate than the U.S. does. The pro-life movement really needs to stop thinking of adoption as an alternative to abortion. It's not. It's like this: abortion is an alternative to pregnancy; adoption is an alternative to parenting. While this one woman MAY HAVE aborted (we don't know for sure) had she not thought of adoption, that's not how it works for most of us. Most of the birthmothers I know had a process like this:

    OMG, I'm pregnant... now what? Abortion? Stay pregnant?

    They then decide they can't go through with an abortion, no matter what... and work out the details (parenting or adoption) later.

    Second: Do you have any CLUE how devastating adoption is for birthmothers? We are at an increased risk for PTSD, depression, SUICIDE, substance abuse, further crisis pregnancies, bonding issues with our subsequent children... and on and on and on.

    I know many women who've had abortions. Yes, some are haunted by them. Many are not. I also know many women who've relinquished their children for adoption. ALL of THEM are scarred for life.

    Please spend some time reading some birthmother blogs. There are more and more of us out there. Adoption is a trauma for us, and one which we're constantly fighting to heal from.